Upheaval

 Storms can uproot the strongest of trees. The torrent of rain can weaken what is usually solid ground. Upheaval happens. Period. 

Unexpectedness

This past year or so I myself had experienced the onslaught of upheaval. Roots that had grown so deep and were established for decades became victim to the elements. We often go through seasons of life wherein we feel comfortable, confident and even bulletproof. That was me, my status, my norm. As a human being, we are made to live among others, some of which do not share the same preventative measures, the same values, the same mindset as do we. Spilled milk syndrome? Absolutely not. 

How we handle the actions of others is paramount to our very survival and ultimate happiness. Of late, it seems that our world is in quite the state of chaos.  Viruses both in a cyber format and physical nature have taken its toll on the sanity and stability of us all. Never in my 51 years of life have I witnessed such angst, aggression, disdain for one another as I do now. While there are always two sides to every coin, two sides to every argument, at the end of the day, it must be imperative that we as human beings not only learn to, but also put into practice, caring for each other. 

My life's upheaval was unexpected and in many ways pretty toxic. Those involved all disappeared with the aid of father time and distance. For that I am very grateful. I am a firm believer that if you live well, behave well, treat man as your equal, show love, patience, and understanding, that for the most part you will reap what you sow.  Harmony and Blessing. 

A father and his son were at a sporting event. The father was hollering in fevered delight as his team scored over and again with ease against the opponent. His son asked his father, " Daddy, why are you yelling so much and grinning?"  His father replied, "My team, they are playing awesomely! Can't you see that?" The son a little distraught had to reply, "No daddy, I can't see what you see. I'm way down here." The father then realized that perspective has a huge impact on Us. His son couldn't join in on the celebration because he could not see it. My point is this: To some, the world we are living in has indeed gone mad. No I do not agree with much that is happening, much of what is being pushed to the forefront and being pressed to be the new norm. But, at the same time, I must see the bigger picture, the picture from My perspective. Of course, perspective can change but that is not a guarantee. 

Whether your team is winning or the other team is, and whether or not you are able to see it with your own eyes, that still does not change the outcome. What I do know is, changes are happening every day. The lives we have lived for so long, that routine we love, those people we adore, those places we enjoy visiting, freedoms we deem important, All of that is changing.

We can agree to disagree, and we can stand our individual ground in the process. At the end of the day, we are all human beings on the same blue ball called Earth. What happens to one, will in turn affect another even if it takes some time for that to happen. For me, I choose to adhere to my beliefs, stand for what I feel and am convicted is right, and all the while, show love and patience to both those in the boat with me and those who are not.  

In closing, my grandpa had a saying that I find absolute gold. He often told me, "You can have character, or you can BE a character."  WOW! There are many characters among us. Choose to not be one, but rather have character, be a man of your word, being reliable, loving, helpful. Those attributes are becoming much more sparse but remain pivotal in every generation.

Be safe out there. Find someone to lend a hand to. And, know, you are not alone in doing good.

The 3rd Season of Life

Wow, has it really been almost a year since my last entry? Apparently so. My oh My, where to begin?

As many of you know, the past couple of years brought to my life new challenges, heartache and much much change. Not all of that was a bad thing, as it has opened new doors of opportunity and blessing. For that I am very grateful. Without revisiting the events of the past year or so, I'm just gonna dig right into the here and now and share a little from my heart about this 3rd season of life I now find myself in.

Growing older are those often dreaded words to hear and even moreso to accept. We see our folks do it, family members, co-workers, friends perhaps as well. For the greater majority that I know, being wiling to accept, "Oh crud, I am no spring chicken anymore" is not always easy. I think men even more than women tend to try and hold onto the past, the glory days. High school is still fresh in our minds, the conquests, victories, popularity, accomplishments, and all those things up into college and the 30's that we are still very proud of. Looking back, I am no different. High school was an amazing time. The accomplishments in music, choir, hiking, adventure seeking, street racing, yes I did that, dating cool gals, running the roads with little common sense as my mental seatbelt, all are memories I will hold fast to until my last days.

So the way I see things, Life has basically 4 seasons to it. No I'm not referring to Spring, Summer, Fall and Winter in a literal Earthly seasonal sense, BUT...….We do have to live through "seasons."

The first I'll call The Formative Years. This is from birth to say early adulthood. The time when you must figure out the basics to survive.  The second season I'll call, Put it into Practice. Early adulthood through middle age. This era is when what you learned prior really must kick in. Paired with that information are new forms of input, learning, adaptation, problem solving skillsets, success And failures. For a lot of folks this is the season of starting a family, establishing your career and what not. Now, season 3. I debated on calling this the, What the Heck Do I Do Now season, but after some thought, let's just call it, Let the Leaves Fall. 

I'll get to season 4, the final journey in a bit. Now, let me talk a little about Letting the Leaves Fall. Although there are many days I still feel invincible, powerful and bulletproof, the years have crept up and I have entered that 3rd season of life. What does that mean? What should that look like? Well, it means that some of the thoughts, beliefs, expectations that I have held onto so tightly until now may need to change or be amended. Recalibration is a good term for it. As a guy, a proud, confident guy, I will always want to think I am still handsome, in shape, mentally and physically gifted among other things. In a lot of ways that is still the case, mostly. In this 3rd season of life however, a guy especially has to begin to embrace changes and stop fighting them so darn much. Things like gaining a little weight, hair thinning in spots, not having the flexibility you used to, OR the metabolism you used to, all are changes that are unavoidable. 

So what should this season look like? Let me preface my answer with a little here and now status update, just so we can be on the same page when it comes to really thinking bout all of this. So, I am now an uncle, and a papaw, don't have kids at home to raise, and many things, causes, events that I used to pour so much time into, well those have fallen by the wayside. Some of these things have waned by choice and a few others by happenstance. A year or 2 back, I was running several groups online in a social media arena, tending to a lot of people's needs, daily activities, being kind of the cheerleader and counselor/mentor in charge of several topics and beliefs that seemed very important at the time. Even had been asked few years ago to start a local Tourettes chapter, which I did with some reluctance. I will say, and this is so hard to admit, but, during the course of events this past couple of years, that group of amazing people, I let down. Got to a point where I didn't know if I was coming or going so how in the world could I facilitate and meet their needs??  Regaining that active, engaging daily rhetoric, I honestly do not know how to do. Anyway, that is something I am having to figure out. Moooo-ving on, as the cow would say. 

So, here I sit at this new juncture in life. I don't really know what I'm doing and that's okay. In fact, that's probably part of the fun of it all. Being able to be a bit more spontaneous,  like waking my wife up at 2 a.m. so we can run up and get a milkshake from Whataburger, or driving down to catch the sun set on the river on a whim, making brownies at 7 in the morning. These are great things that you cannot easily do with your plate overly full and kids at home. Now I have the opportunity to spoil grandkids, be the fun and playful uncle, be a huge benefit to my wife, love on our dogs more, take care of my mom and hers. Yes, the daily must do's are still around, but we tackle that together. Having the wife and partner who will wash dishes, cook with you, work around the house, the yard, shop, or just catch a ballgame, man, that's pure gold! 

This year saw the passing of my amazing Grandmother, as well as my uncle. Also there was getting my mother moved over here to my town, getting her house sold. Now we are in the middle of Grandma's house being sold after having to work so hard sorting, boxing, rehoming, moving furniture and prepping her house to be sold. It has been an emotionally tough year to say the least. Doors have opened and continue to open daily. I have a new church home this year, I'm playing in the band, having made some wonderful new friends in the process. We have a new puppy who is turning out to be such a smart lil guy and loving to boot. Life has simplified greatly. Up until this spring, I was on the go 20 hours a day, trying to be all things to all people. I had to step way back, not because I stopped loving those persons, but I was empty. You cannot feed or water someone else's soul if yours is running on empty. Stepping back does not make you heartless. It took some real soul searching, prayer and confirmation to truly realize that. 

I love to write. I love to share with people. I love to encourage, bring about smiles. So much of that has been remiss until this summer.  In this season of Letting the Leaves fall,  I am learning what to make priority and what to make as optional. I will always desire to love on people, do for them, meet needs, pray over them, go see them, give helping hands best I can, go and do and be busy. But, if it comes at a cost of killing myself mentally, emotionally, physically?  Are you really helping at all in the grand scheme?  For 50 years, I have tackled life, not wavering, not cutting corners, fighting battles that some cannot fathom. Through it all, I am still here. I am blessed. God has seen me through so so much. There is no way to ever repay Him for his mercy, His blessing, His direction. Am I perfect? No way! I am content. Content for the first time in a long time, knowing I am where I am meant to be, doing what I am meant to do. So, if accepting that I'm not 16 anymore, accepting that my life's experiences and wisdom are valid and have value to be  shared, accepting that a different pace with a  different focus IS what is needed, so be it. Bring on this new season! I am ready, willing and mostly able. Ha! 

Oh, what's season 4 you have reminded me to explain? Okay, season 4, I'll call The Credits. As a former film/tv major, I am very familiar with credits. At the end of a tv show or a film, credits roll by showing and acknowledging who did what in the production.  Bob Smith may be listed as Gaffer. Suzanne Meyers may be listed as CG operator. Monica Lewis may be Videography Editor and so on. You see, most people when they see the credits start rolling by, they assume, "yep, it's over." NOT TRUE!!  Season 4 of our lives is the same. The Credits means letting those watching you acknowledge what you've done, and you doing the same to others. What we have, what we have accomplish, what we STILL do and accomplish, all are part of our "credits." I'm not there yet, but someday, if the good Lord tarries long enough, I will be. My credit roll will display so much about my life. I hope at whatever season of life you are in right now. you embrace it whole heartedly. I'll close by sharing this link to a pretty good article that summarizes why your should embrace the stage and season of life you are currently in. 

https://www.crosswalk.com/faith/spiritual-life/10-reasons-to-embrace-the-season-of-life-you-re-in.html

Fall (the season) is in the air. Days have slowly begun to get a little cooler. Soon leaves will change color, shape, and some will fall and crumble on the ground. All part of life. Now, you go, go and enjoy this Fall, all that you are, and all that others are as well. Be kind, be polite, and always show love. 

Got em, Check em!

October is not only the month Fall begins to settle in and welcome us with cooler temps and the turning of leaves. It is also the month of Halloween. Now I'm not here to talk about all hallows eve, but to remind you that You need to be aware of a very important and dangerous trick! Yep, I mean breast cancer. It is breast cancer awareness month. Most of us upon hearing that think of the female breast and what a lump could do, the dreaded biopsy or diagnosis of breast cancer. Men, you have breast tissue as well!

Now that we have that reminder out of the way, let me offer some reminders of how serious cancer is and how you need to Check Yourself.

This is not the time to PLAY doctor! This is serious business. Your very life may depend on how thoroughly you check your breasts. 

Women have all different sizes and shapes of breasts and that can make checking yourself a little awkward or even difficult. If you do a self exam and aren't confident that you have done it well, there is no shame in having a trusted friend check you as well. 

BIG OR SMALL, SAVE THEM ALL

If it's been a while since you have done a self exam or you never have done one, let me offer this diagram to help you get it taken care of. 

For Women: 

And for the Men: 

Whew! Good reminders huh?  I've lost several family members to cancer, have had a lot of friends both men and women who have both suffered and had to deal with breast cancer. This post is a bit off the line from my normal posts but it is a very important topic that often goes un-talked about. In addition to breast cancer, women also risk cervical or ovarian cancer. That is not something you can really check on your own, so please make sure and have that done by your doctor at least annually, especially if you are over age 35-40.  

Yes, I shared a pic of fully nude women. Here's why. I want it to be imprinted in your mind's eye by seeing the entire female body, ladies,  a reminder there is more of you than your breasts that are susceptible to the evils of cancer. So take whatever preventative measures you need to, ladies. Along with diet, different food choices to help thwart cancer, exercise is helpful, plenty of rest as well as awareness. 

Okay, so you are a man reading this blog post and you're thinking, " I do love boobs and I love my girlfriend or my wife, and want her to always be healthy, but what can I do?"  Glad you asked, gentlemen. 

1. You can encourage and remind your lady to check herself and/or go get checked.

2. You can post to social media something about Breast Cancer Awareness.

3. You can offer to help your lady with her self exam IF she needs you to.

4. And you can do what I've done in the past, and even wear a T shirt in support of saving the tatas. 

   

Women can survive breast cancer and even if a breast or both must be removed, I want to make it perfectly clear that that woman's worth and beauty does not change!! Forget what the media says, Hollywood, fashion. You are still the wonderful, amazing, talented, loving woman you always were. Do not let anyone tell you differently, gals. 

Should you have to have your beloved breast(s) removed, there are a number of cool ways to enjoy your new self as well. Many women have gotten beautiful tattoos, some as a tribute, others as adornment. It is always an option, but let's hope for the best that you never have to go down that road.

In closing, let's have a little bit of humor thrown in just to lighten the mood a bit. 

 Breasts are amazing in their function for nursing, and do provide a bit of confidence and sex appeal when needed. I do hope that this blog post gives you courage and confidence as you check yourselves this month, and also reminds the men, that they too need to be doing some checking!

Be well, and let's all promote cancer awareness and pray for a cure.

Tourette's and the Journey: Part One

Life can be harder than advertised. We ALL know that to be true. As little kids we looked around and took in all that our eyes and minds could, hoping one day that when we grew up we would be able to have our dreams come true. With wide eyed wonder, we unknowingly were gazing at life through the lense of rose colored glasses, unfortunately. For some kids, they really were able to grow up and not only chase after their dreams but caught and owned them! To those I say, Well done.

 I had loved music since I was very small. At age 4 my dad and I would sing together all the time. I still have cassette tapes of our singing together to this day. Treasures I hope to also have in my possession. As I grew older I kept myself eyeball deep in singing, spent years and years in chorus, ensembles, quartets, competitions on a state level. Music enthralled me, encompassed everything that I did. It was my muse, my therapy, my outlet, and my passion. At age 18 my dream was to sing for a living. I was well on my way in making that really happen. Then it hit.

Within the span of two weeks, my neck became pulled way back and drawn over to the right, almost to my shoulder. The pain was incredible. Not even the strength of four grown men could dislodge or move my neck. It was hard as stone. This was the first real downer I had experienced in my life with Tourette's. What this was medically called is Torticollis. Basically in layman's terms, that means, your muscles are locked up and will not relax or let go. For the next 2 years, I would lie on the floor in a ball, crying my eyes out, yelling in pain, while popping pain meds like M&M's to no avail. Finally, after countless hours and months of phone calls, my parents found a doctor in Houston at Baylor College of Medicine who said he would see me. To make a long story short, this doc ended up being the foremost authority on issues just like mine. Every 6 months for the next 2 years, I received very painful injections of Botox into my neck muscles. Worked like a charm. Life was normal and pain free until the injections wore off. Fortunately and with the grace of God, my neck torticollis finally just ceased. Free at last! Normal life could continue, my dreams of singing could once again be pursued.

As nice as that would've been, yea, more issues were awaiting not far down the road. It was within a few short years, after I had graduated college with a high GPA and magna cum laude honor, that the next round of life altering events would hit. How do you think you would react if in the span of a couple of weeks, your voice just disappeared? You were unable to say a single word, unless you used some alternate cartoon type voice?? Let me tell you, it was mind blowingly devastating! My 2nd degree in Mass Media/Tv/Film Production was in the last 6 weeks, with a huge film directing project still to be presented. Couldn't do it. No matter how hard I would try, there was no way to direct a film project, newscast  or any of that having no voice. Talk about a buzz kill!! For the next 5+ years, I had no voice. My job that I had, I could no longer do without a voice so I had to resort to using the strength aspect of my body which was very strong. Tourettes affords many people with incredible strength, almost unheard of strength. As an example: I toted a 750 lb fire proof file cabinet up a flight of stairs myself using just a hand truck. Crazy right?  In the gym, I was a beast. My strength was now my bread and butter. Being the labor mule was now my apparent destiny. 

After 5 years I had learned a lot. You see, and I am a bit ashamed to admit this, but before I lost my voice, I had some bias against certain people. I could not stand being around or having to interact with persons with any kind of disability, or elderly persons. Not sure why, but I would avoid those two sects of people like the plague. During my 5 years of not speaking, guess what happened? The old saying, God gave you one mouth and two ears so you can listen twice as much as you talk really hit home. During that time, person after person crossed my path from the well of humanity I had such disdain for. Man, what wisdom, love and enlightenment did they bring into my life! Near the 6 year point, and after  years of effort and struggle, my voice began to return. It was different than it had been prior but it had come home again. I had been a bass singer, but now, I was a tenor. Imagine that. The music in my soul was so full now and I had such reason to sing. Joy overflowed from my being. 

Life went on, work was good once again. My voice had found a working point and I once again had a renewed faith it was all going to be okay. 2 years later, the need for 40 injections of Botox in my face muscles had to happen for a few sessions. Their was damage similar to a stroke to now contend with. It affected speech, facial gestures, even smiling. Undaunted, I pushed on. I'd been through so much already, this was just another page in another chapter of the book I called, Uniquely Me.

The dream of singing had to change. The dream of lots of things had to change. It was down to finding ways for me to continue in life making the best I could out of whatever was thrown my way. I was okay with that. I finally got a neurologist who was highly recommended and supposedly one of the better ones in the area. Under his care for the next nearly 9 years things went well. Let me give you all a huge word of caution. The drug Haldol is a horrible drug and needs to be banned from every being administered to anyone. What happened next from that drug being in my body led to the worst events to date. In part two of this blog post, I'll get into all of that, and get ya up to speed on where I am now. Trust me, you won't wanna miss part two! Should have it out within the next week. 

I guess the best way to end this for now is in simply saying, life is very unpredictable. As Forrest Gump so beautifully stated, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." Such truth. No matter how well you plan and think things out, there will always be detours and roadblocks and the need to think on the fly, change your course. It's just life rolls. I've been asked a lot, if I could go back and do it all again, without what I've been through, would I?  Absolutely not. All that I have endured and overcome has made me the man I am today. Without those purging fires, and pressure, this lump of coal would not be transforming into a diamond. 

You must learn to make peace with the cards you are dealt. It's not always easy to do so. Keeping a positive attitude, not giving up, finding within you the good things, that is well worth the effort. So, as you face this week, look for that peace in every situation. It's there somewhere! I promise you it is. And guess what? That peace may come from simply being available to help another person, say a kind word, lend a listening ear. Don't be afraid to be you! The world would not be as sweet without you.

Harsh Reality of KID-dom

Life is funny. We all experience things, events and situations that, well, just make us laugh.
Last night I was sitting in our living room, our son was wandering about, bored to tears, so he came over to my desk where I sitting, looking online at RV's. The wife and I were just talking out of sheer "what ifs" about one day when the kid is grown and gone, about getting an RV and doing some sight seeing. Anyway, as I am finding ones online for sale, I am forwarding them to the Mrs. to show her.

Well, kiddo sat there beside me for a minute and then out of the blue, after overhearing she and I talk, he says to me, "SO, you and mom are just gonna get an RV and hit the road, leaving me by myself and all alone one day?" I turned to him and said, " It is a possibility. But it won't be until you are 18 and on your own. He looked at me with a stunned, bewildered look on his face. "When you reach adulthood, that will be YOUR time to get a job, your own place to live, your friends and so on, and start living YOUR life," I stated. With furrowed brow he looked at me and said, " I don't want to do ANY of that!!" Smiling as I chuckled, I turned to him saying, "Hey, you are NOT going to live with us forever! That's not how it works. Ya see, after parents spend 18+ years sacrificing time, money and tons of effort, they need time to regain their freedom and enjoy life again. So at that point, they will enjoy having the house to themselves again, the freedom to come and go as they please, do what they like and not have to worry about their children or having to plan around them." He got mad! I mean the angriest face I've seen him don is a LONG time. With disgust and venom in his eyes, he says, "That Ain't gonna happen!" And he stomped off.

"Ain't gonna happen!"    

He went to take a shower and my wife and I just laughed and laughed. Now, we found this super funny because, even though we raise our son to be independent, think for himself, do stuff on his own and by himself, he still thinks, in earnest, that that is going to continue forever. I guess at some point, all kids have that thought. But he is 11 and we have been telling him for the past couple of years that his job is to finish school, do well, and graduate so that he can attend college if he chooses, then get a job and career, get his own place and be on his own. This was not new information to him last night. I get the thought he has about staying in a safe place where Mom and Dad are always there fixing, doing and taking care of him, but that is not reality.

Growing up I never questioned the fact that one day I would be on my own. I wanted to be on my own much sooner than I actually was, but that was due to very serious, life altering medical issues that were beyond my control. I wanted to travel, see the world and experience what making my own path was like. I looked forward to it. When I did get my own place, a very nice townhouse that my folks bought for me, I absolutely loved it. I was never out of work for more than 2 days, I was responsible for the most part, paid my bills, did my thing and never looked back. Now, I know other grown men who have moved back home for various reasons, and that is their choice. For me, I don't see that as being needed at this point. However, even with family in tow, if my Mom came to a point where she honestly needed my help, we would take care of her wherever we needed to.

As adults and even as parents, we all have the desire and need, a bit of wanderlust, to go and enjoy life without kids once they are grown. Sure there is the empty nest syndrome, but even that doesn't last forever, and a trip to some gorgeous vista, a remote beach in Hawaii or some other place has a way of medicating that syndrome. For us, we want to see our country, not all of it, but hit the places that inspire us. And after having been a parent for so long, having to be the shining example your kids look up to and learn from, ya, you may even want to "live a little" as they say by going doing some things that break the norm, break the mold, but things that you will never forget. Like going skydiving, rock climbing, checking out a clothing optional beach, or going to a sweat lodge or dude ranch.

Look, any parent will tell you that their kids mean the world to them and they will always bend over backwards to take care of them and their needs. We are no exception. At the same time, the good Lord created us and made parental roles for a reason AND for a season. How we will explain the fact of life to our son that he will  have to leave us and start his life may still be a little unclear, but yea, that talk will come. He will leave that conversation probably a little sad, but he will also realize the opportunity to succeed and be his own man is a good thing. In the mean time, we will keep holding fast to our dreams of our hippie school bus RV and all the memories we will make as a couple, sans kids.

Parenting sometimes is tough, and comical, and stressful, and joyful, ,and deserving of a combat medal or purple heart, but I wouldn't trade being a parent for anything. I leave you with this.....Enjoy the time you have with your kids, but also raise them up to be responsible, God fearing, successful persons, that will make great positive impacts on everyone that they meet. That is a legacy and achievement that a parent will be proud of. Cheers to you all on your adventures. Be blessed!

I'm a "has been?"

For those who know me and are familiar with my story, please bear with me. For those who do NOT know my story, put your seat belt on! I've got a word for you!

The title of the is post may seem a bit confusing at first. Has been? I'm sure we all are pretty familiar with that terminology and what it connotes. Someone or something that has seen better days, has been forgotten, has been kicked to the curb, washed up and no longer relevant. Sound about right? Well, let me explain myself. In the right context, has been makes total sense. Here are some examples:

My life HAS been hard.
The goal I had for my life HAS been taken away.
My career HAS been better.
What I thought I knew, HAS been challenged.

Getting the idea?

Okay. My posts are generally not geared specifically to religious topics or are they primarily God centered. This post, however, will be. If that offends you, GOOD! Perhaps a nerve needs to be struck in your heart and mind and this could be the medium for that to be accomplished.

Reading over this graphic above can illicit many thoughts. The truth of it though is that Yes, we do all face trials. Yes, we do all experience change. How you handle those trials and the changes is the key. I grew up, since age 10 or so, having to deal with and face the challenges of Tourette's Syndrome. For those unfamiliar with what that is, in a nut shell, it is a neurological disorder in which key chemicals are missing in the brain that arrest motor and nerve signals. In lay terms, parts of my body tend to do what they want, when they want and my brain cannot stop it. For most folks, if you want to blink your eye, you think it and in milliseconds your brain translates that into the action of blinking. If you want to stop blinking, the same applies. For Tourette's persons, eyes can twitch on their own, vocal noises can spew forth, muscles can move and twitch at will. For me growing up, I was mildly affected. At the age of 18, a senior in high school, things made a downturn. Within a matter of 2 weeks time, my neck became paralyzed, drawn fully back and to the right. I looked like a statue cast in stone but in a contorted, awkward way. For the next 2 1/2 years, my life was a living hell. The pain was nearly unbearable. My doctors were totally stumped. I was taken to every specialist in the country with no help in sight. Short version, I was treated with experimental injections of Botox in my neck muscles. Withing 2 days, I was loose as a rubber chicken. Within 6 months my neck would once again draw up to a paralyzed state. 2 1/2 years I endured the 8 inch needles being inserted deep into my tissue. God knew the entire time, exactly what he was doing. He had a plan for me. I will give you the background in another post down the line about why I feel He allowed this to happen. It is a testament to my ignorance and my abandoning God. That is your teaser for now. 

God,in His grace and mercy, took this pain and hardship away from me, in time. Thankful beyond words. Not 3 years later, I would face yet another even more life altering dilemma. In my final 6 weeks of my bachelor's degree program, my voice disappeared. I had always been a very outspoken, outgoing guy who used his voice to sing, talk, teach, and converse. Not anymore. There was nothing more detrimental to me emotionally than to not be able to do something as simple as ordering a hamburger at the drive thru. For nearly 6 years, this plagued me. As I shared with a dear brother last night, God had to put me flat on my back so that when I opened my eyes I was looking Up, at my Creator.  He was my Savior, but he was not my Lord. Before you throw me under the bus for wording it that way, hear me out. Every person will bow one day and proclaim Jesus as Lord, saved or lost. In my instance I want to clarify, that I was not Making God the Lord over my life. I was running from Him. Even though he has brought me thru my neck trauma, and I said I was grateful, I still did not "get"it.  During those 6 years, I was taught some very valuable, life changing lessons. I learned to accept people that God put in my path, no matter their age, their disability, their background or their status. Again, that is the topic for a whole other post. Through endless time on my knees, on my face, pleading with God, truly finding Him again, He restored my voice. 

For the sake of some brevity, I'll jump ahead a bit. Since that time in my early 20 to mid 20's, life had not gotten any easier. I have developed Tardive Dyskinesia, (another neurological disorder), fibromyalgia, median nerve damage, carpal tunnel and severe arthritis in my back. Did and has God been able to use me all these years since my voice was restored, absolutely. BUT, the goal I had for my life had to change. The plan I had for my life had to change. The attitude of my ambition, my drive, had to change. Your past is kind of like your backside. It is meant to stay behind you. Is it relevant and necessary, of course it is! But should you try to keep placing it in front of you, absolutely not! 

Throughout the years I have been blessed with the opportunities to use my god given gifts and talents in singing, playing music, writing music, running sound equipment, teaching youth, adults at church. He has opened doors for me that have gone far beyond my understanding. A few of those doors I will admit, I walked through only to later, run back out of. Yet, as part of God's ultimate, divine plan for my life, he has used those times of doubt and denial. 

The point I want to make very clear in this post today is this. We all need God. We need him in our lives, our spirit and we all need his gift of Salvation. Once you can admit that, come to him humbly, lay aside the YOU, and seek JUST Him, ask him to come into your heart, forgive you of your sins and make you whole and righteous in His sight, the doors of opportunity and blessing will then be accessible to you. People often ask, "why does God let bad things happen to people?" Well, there are many possible answers to that question. From personal experience, I can tell you My answer. He let's things happen to you to expose your vulnerabilities, to show you your need for Him. In the Bible, many men faced incredibly horrible things. Paul, in addition to spending much of his life being imprisoned, he also had a "thorn" in his side to daily contend with. We do not know what that thorn was, but we do know it was HUGE for him. He had to daily lay it all down and wholly seek God to get through it. Job is another example. Read the story of Job. What God allowed Satan to put him through will blow your mind. All the while though, God has Job's back. He had his heart. 

What I want to leave you with is this one thought or concept to mull over. We were created to be most excellent. God is a god of prosperity. That goes far beyond a monetary prosperity. It extends to your health, your legacy, your abilities, your journey. God did not create you to sit idly by and let the world pass you by. He made you to be vibrant, alive in Him, making a difference, and to do so in the face of ANY obstacle or adversity. You may not see that. You may never have seen that be true for you. It is not the truth because I have lived it and experienced it. It is truth because the Word of God declares it so! My challenge to you this very day is to choose to dive into the Word. Choose to become intimate with God. Choose to let him break you and tear down the barriers and walls build around you and your life. We all have a story to tell. Bull Bramlett, the famous football player and brawler has an incredible story! YOURS is just as amazing. I pray that you seek God and allow him to turn your story into one that can be used to encourage others, to inspire others and to draw you close to Him. We are not guaranteed our next breath. The deaths of famous folks just this week, once again prove that. We are on borrowed time and we are also Not of this world. You are called out. You are made for a higher calling and for such a time as this. Be bold, Live boldy in Christ. If you cannot claim Jesus as your Father, and you need help figuring that out, or prayer about anything, please contact me. I am not an expert by any means. I don't know all the answers. But,as my dear friend Frankie says, I Do know the author of THE BOOK.  

I thank you for taking the time to read this lengthy post. Richest blessing to you this week as you choose to be a difference maker in this wicked old world we live in. 

The Twenty and Sixteen Challenge

The hustle and bustle of the Christmas season has now passed. Santa came and went, a Savior's birth was celebrated, and time once again marched on. It is the new year! Congratulations on making it first of all!  For myriads of us, 2015 was a challenging year in oh so many ways, but like crowds of others, I am grateful for all that was put on my plate, crossed my path and impacted my life this past year.

In this new 2016, several things have already come to mind that i need to do more of this year. I want to share them with you, in the hopes that you as well, might find them WORTH the time and investment. Anyone who knows me much at all, knows that I like to be challenged and to push myself day in and day out. Whether that is intellectually, spiritually, physically or otherwise, I like trying to improve and go beyond the status quo.

Number one on the list:

Learn something new everyday

Why? This old world is huge and voluminous in its content. There is always some one who knows more than you; Pick their brain.  There is always some THING that you don't understand; Do some homework, some research to better wrap your mind around whatever IT is. There is always a need for someone to birth new ideas;  Medical, Technology,  Economy, Theology etc. are all areas that perhaps YOU could impact with your unique thought. Don't become complacent and simply allow your mind to just run through a daily routine. Challenge your brain! The human brain is like any other part of your body. It needs exercising to stay at or reach an optimal level of operation.

Number two on the list:

Engage is healthy debates or conversation

Here again, the general theme is, keeping that mind of your busy with Good things. Anytime someone willingly debates or has a lively conversation, your personal beliefs are either solidified or they become beliefs that you might feel the need to look at again with more depth. We all like to think that OUR way of doing something, or OUR opinion is the only valid one out there, and in some cases that may be true. In others, ah, not so much.
Remind me to tell you guys about my Dad teaching me to sweep, one of these days. Trust me, it really DOES fit in, there is just not time or space for the telling of that lesson here today.


Number three on the list:

Be more friendly

I am already hearing the uproar from my introverts in the crowd, but truth of the matter is, that any act of being more friendly is a good thing. If you have to just smile and that's it, good for you!.
Did you know that it takes more muscles and effort to frown than to smile?

Yep, college is full of information! I can be down in the dumps, feeling like a wet dog stuck in a swamp and if I make myself smile or speak to someone in a kind way, I automatically feel a bit better on the inside.

In today's world with all the unrest between religious groups, political parties, views on gender identity and the like, it can be difficult to set aside our personal view and Just be friendly; however, it Can be done. Here recently I was in line at a restaurant and there was a man who was very argumentative with the lady next to him. He was ranting on about how wrong she was and how ignorant she is. I listened a couple of minutes to their exchange and finally just said to myself, "I need to fix this."  I took a step toward them and simply said these 6 little words, "That sun sure is smiling today." Immediately the two of them smiled at me and then at each other, dropped their ridiculous banter and calmed down.  If you are not the type to engage someone, or speak up if not directly spoken to, that's fine. Just smile or nod. Offer someone your spot in line if you have the time. Give someone that 20 cents they cant seem to dig out of their purse for their purchase. Anything. Be more friendly. I promise you, You won't be the only one to benefit from it.

Number four on the list:

Read more books

Is your daily existence making you feel down, depressed, hurried and rushed? Can't afford to or have time to take a get away? Need some inspiration, some motivation? Read!! The magic of a book is its ability to take you to a plethora of places, to involve you in a whirl wind of stories, people, ideas. Books engage you from a visceral level and also can engage your emotions, your "heart." I have never been a big reader. Over the years though, forcing myself to read more and read books outside of my preferred topics, I have actually discovered some of the uniqueness and rarity only a good book can bring. Don't know what to read? Well, with all the available topics, classic novels, periodicals, the Bible, poetry out there, just pick something to start with. If you don't find that ONE magical book right off the bat, choose another. Deciding what to read takes a bit of effort and some trail and error. But, once you've hit upon the right author, the right topic, genre or series, You can become hooked. Reading is best done in a quiet place, often alone, apart from the chaos of the world around you. Finding and making that time is something we all need to do. Should you opt for quiet time and still don't want to spend it reading, well, here are a couple more ideas to help you keep your sanity.

* write a letter
* take photos
* take care of a plant
* visit the beach or some spot in nature
* bake something tasty

Whatever you end up doing in 2016, I do hope you find peace, joy and happiness. We have been given this year as a blank canvas. Paint something memorable that leaves people with a smile on their face and with a difference being made in their heart and mind.

Happy New Year everyone!! Be blessed.